News and notes from Reston (tm).

Tuesday, November 19, 2019

Your Name Here: Metro Naming Rights Only The Tip of The Earth-Toned Iceberg

We were VERY excited to hear that Metro, in its infinite wisdom, is devoting time and attention to addressing longstanding maintenance and operational issues that have transformed a world-class transit system into an unreliable laughingstock selling the naming rights for the Innovation Center Metro Station in nearby Herndon, if you consider an upside-down building next to a giant gravel pit "Herndon." Give us some sweet meeting minutes blockquote, BFFs at Reston Now:

"A unique and time-sensitive opportunity has arisen where a Fortune Global 500 Company, currently in negotiations to lease headquarters adjacent to the new Innovation Center Metro station has expressed interest in being the corporate sponsor for this new station,” the Metro documents said.
Awesome! We love Brands(tm), so we see no downside to this. But why stop there? After all, Reston's Silver Line Metro stops are named after a corporation too, and a long-defunct one at that. This seems like a golden opportunity to draw in some other Fortune 500 companies to make some sweet cash "revitalize Reston's brand," or whatever.

Here are a few humble suggestions:

WIEHLE-RESTON EAST:
• Comstock-Comstock East
HQ 0
Maggie Parker For Supervisor Stop, But Anyone Else Is Welcome To Name This Station Too, Maybe
McTacoPupatella, Pending Further Redevelopment
• Hidden Creek Golf Course (short-term lease for naming rights)

RESTON TOWN CENTER:
• Boston Not-So-Strong Properties
• TBD - winner of an unmanipulated naming contest which will have NOTHING to do with parking
• Wegmans North
• Nail Salon-Candle Bar South
• Restonian Dot Org World Headquarters*
• Reston National Golf Course (short-term lease for naming rights)

* Assuming they open the eligibility criteria to Fortune 500,000,000 companies

And let's not forget the "Herndon" stop, which is actually right across the street from Reston's Polo Fields neighborhood. But since it's unlikely the Polo Fields HOA will be able to scrape together the cash for the naming rights, there's really only one option here: Jimmy's South, the end.

Update: The Metro board has pulled the discussion on naming rights pending further discussions with Fairfax County. We're reasonably certain they're considering some of the options listed above.

2 comments:

  1. Janis Jaundiced Gray JoplinNovember 19, 2019 at 8:50 PM

    Naming rights are just another word for nothing else to lose.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Peasant From Less Sought After South RestonNovember 26, 2019 at 9:48 PM

    Given the way businesses are leaving, how about renaming the Reston Town Center station Tumbleweed Junction?

    We can even re-purpose the catchy theme song from the 60's TV show Petticoat Junction:

    Come ride the Metro train that is rolling down the tracks to the junction.

    Forget about parking apps, it is time to relax at the junction.

    Lotsa vacancies, you bet
    Even more, when you get
    To the junction
    Tumbleweed Junction

    There's a candle bar called the Paddywax at the junction.
    Tumbleweed Junction

    It is fun all right, come and dip your wick at the junction.
    Tumbleweed Junction

    And that’s Panera Bread, one of 30 that have fled from the junction,
    Tumbleweed Junction.




    ReplyDelete

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