News and notes from Reston (tm).

Friday, January 22, 2021

Okay, Fine: You Can Have A Little Bernie Meme, As A Treat

After having had this meme of our favorite socialist (and also Bernie Sanders!) forwarded to us a half-dozen times, and seeing it repeatedly again as we doomscrolled our social media feeds, we've relented: here is a little Bernie meme, as a treat. It makes sense, as Lake Anne Plaza -- as it was originally envisioned in the hippy-dippy 60s -- was essentially Democratic Socialist Wakanda, a veritable Vermont of the mind in the then-deep South. 

No truth to the rumor that this filthy "web log" is going to become a cat blog, though, the end.

Friday, January 8, 2021

New Year, Same Old Lake Anne Business Closures (Updated)

As we enter a new year, two three Lake Anne businesses -- Teapot and Cake, Local VA, and longtime mainstay Cafe Montmartre -- have closed; the former permanently, the latter last two temporarily. Check out the post below on Instagram, where we go for all our business news:


In recent years, there's been surprising stability at Lake Anne Plaza, which has been nice to see. But if what the Local VA folks allege about heating/AC in their unit is true, it seems like there's something else that's been stable: landlord-tenant relationships so out of wack with market conditions that Fairfax County devoted a big chunk of a report to them nearly a decade ago, the end. 

Tuesday, January 5, 2021

Keep Hope, Higher Electric Bills Alive As We Ring In The New Year

The endless "were those gunshots or fireworks I just heard?" posts on Nextdoor have been replaced by endless "when do they pick up the Christmas trees?" posts, so we know we're in the new year, and not a moment too soon! But don't take down the holiday lights just yet, say the folks at Reston Hospital Center. Give us some social media-friendly blockquote, BFFs at Facebook:

Holiday lights provide an emotional boost to everyone who sees them. In this challenging year, these lights have become for many a sign of normalcy and hope. That’s why this January, we are asking everyone to keep their holiday lights up to thank these healthcare heroes for all they are doing to help our community fight this pandemic. Whether these lights decorate the outside of your business, your community, or your home, Keep Your Lights Up For Healthcare Heroes. (Through January 31st.)

So don't call the DRB if your neighbor's ticky-tacky light display or giant inflatable reindeer is still up. You can find other reasons to be annoyed by them

Here's hoping that 2021 will be a better year. This other bit of recent news from Reston Hospital Center is a hint that it might be:

A happy (or happier) New Year, indeed.

Wednesday, December 30, 2020

See Ya 2020, The Russet Brown Of Reston Years

2020 has been.... interesting, as Reston's starring role in a potential pandemic was supplanted by the real thing. We wore masks, and complained when people didn't! We protested! And we baked a lot of bread.... and maybe a few other things

One thing that hasn't changed is our commitment, here at this filthy "web log," to document what's hot and what's not as we ring in 2021 in our plastic fantastic planned community. Without further ado, let the lazy listicle trenchant analysis begin!

Spreading COVID on golf coursesSpreading particleboard
developments on golf courses,
though hopefully no time soon?

Woonerf (RIP)

Dystopian cityscapes
Reston: The SofaReston: The Underpass
Best BuyWorst Buy
Elite grocery storesWEGMANS, at some point
Neo-Nazi jerksLiterally ANYTHING else
Mocking TysonsMocking Ashburn, now and always

Celebrity sightings

BASE jumper
McTacoHut (RIP)McHouses 
Jokes about RTC parkingJokes about 420' mauvescraper
Reston: The Magazine (RIP)Filthy "web logs," now and always

After this year, we're all graduates, though hopefully not this kind. 

Tuesday, December 15, 2020

Blade Runner 20190: Reston Station Goes Cyberpunk

Say, what's that eerie blue glow lighting up all of Reston Station that can be seen from blocks away? Is it a giant ultraviolet machine designed to zap the COVID off the handful of people currently walking to the Metro station? A cutting-edge shoplifting prevention device for the CVS under it, or maybe just a light bright enough to read its mile-long receipts?

Haha, no, that might actually be useful. Instead, it's a giant video screen, which currently is alternating between videos of sharks and festive Christmas scenes. Here it is again, from street level.

It's definitely an attention grabber, plus a helpful way to ensure that the folks living on that side of BLVD are deprived of vowels and sleep.  Seems innocuous at the moment, but wait until Comstock decides to run a replicant for a potentially lucrative seat in county government, the end.

I've seen things you wouldn't believe. Improperly painted wood trim bright as magnesium... I rode on the back decks of a DRB drone and watched bumblebees glitter in the dark near the Northgate. All those moments... they'll be lost in time, like tears in rain. 

Wednesday, December 2, 2020

Soylent DRB-Approved Shade Of Green: Terraset Elementary Takes Continued School Closures In Delicious Stride

After Fairfax County Schools announced it was postponing plans to bring nearly 7,000 of its youngest students back to in-person learning on Dec. 1, Terraset Elementary in Reston apparently decided to take the continued closure seriously, as this cellular telephone photo shared by Confidential Restonian Operative "Terry" shows:

Just something to keep in mind the next time your neighbor who just happens to be a member of the Terraset PTA offers to share some of his/her homegrown tomatoes:


Monday, November 23, 2020

Reston’s 420’ Tower Is Apparently Good For A Different Kind of High

We recently noted that Reston’s tallest building, going up near the future Reston Town Center Metro station, topped out at 420 (heh) feet. Man, we haven’t laughed that hard since someone lent us a Cheech and Chong cassette back in middle school!

But it turns out there’s a different kind of high that the building may be offering. On Saturday night, a Confidential Restonian Operative driving on the Dulles Toll Road witnessed someone BASE jumping off the top of the under-construction building, parachuting to a (hopefully) safe landing somewhere near where Targetville once stood.

It’s happened round these here parts before, when one of the tallest buildings in the Emerald City Paris Tysons Corner was under construction, and there’s video to prove it. We’ve been scouring the YouTubes and the TikToks and all the other social medias the kids love so much to see if someone’s posted similar grainy GoPro videos of the Reston jump, but so far, nothing. Someone hit up your friendly neighborhood “web logger,” as the kids haven’t said in quite some time, the end.