News and notes from Reston (tm).

Tuesday, October 12, 2010

We Spoke Too Soon: Fairfax County Hamburglar (tm) May Be Back on the Scene

robble.jpegNo sooner did we declare that the North County Fairfax County Hamburglar (tm) may have decamped for greener more particleboard-intensive pastures than Fairfax County Police sent a fancy "press release," saying they went door to door along Hunter Mill Road this morning to warn neighbors that two more incidents took place early Tuesday morning.

Police responded to a report in the 1800 block of Horseback Trail around 7 a.m. on Tuesday, October 12. The resident stated that cash was removed from her purse overnight. Following a neighborhood canvas, officers determined a burglar(s) had attempted to enter at least one other home.

Mason District police officers also canvassed the Mantua area neighborhood on Thursday, October 7 and received two reports of additional burglary attempts and one larceny from a vehicle. Detectives believe these crimes may have occurred in connection with similar incidents that took place Friday, October 1.
Once again, the Hamburglar seems to prefer McMansions on large wooded lots to our more dense development, which is apparently preferred by more garden variety creeps.

Meanwhile, along with Prince William County, similar burglary attempts may have taken place in bucolic Waterford in Loudoun County. Frankly, we think this is too much to be the work of one moppet man. At great personal expense, we used the most up-to-date criminal forensics software ever created to develop a composite of the FCH's accomplices:


You're welcome.


  1. ...pull my finger.

  2. I endured my entire arduous 6-mile Herndon-Reston commute yesterday, encountering only one speed trap. Could FCPD have been released from their reveune responsibility to Serve and Protect?

  3. I thought they were mostly Herndon cops. There's the two on Spring Street that are always trying to catch cars as they come off of Herndon Parkway or Fairfax County Parkway.

  4. This time it was in my neighborhood. Somebody, please kill the fucker.


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