News and notes from Reston (tm).

Friday, March 18, 2016

So Long, A and E: Yet More Vowels Disappear From Reston Names


Following in the footsteps of hipper-than-thou VY and BLVD, yet another Reston establishment has caught the vowel-free bug. With the speed at which those pesky As and Es are falling off of signs, has Reston contracted a strain of diphthong leprosy? Or -- wait for it -- irritable vowel syndrome?

But we digress. Naked Pizza is now NKDpizza, as part of one of those fancy "rebrandings" those of us in the DC area who aren't engaged in strapping bombs to dolphins are employed to engineer. The company's press release (or, more accurately, prss rls) announcing the changes said that NKD decided to "drop the A(additives) and E(xtras)." Then there was this baffling sentence:

In its new iteration, customers will find a proprietary 10-grain Ancestral Blend (TM) crust with 10 ancient grains and prebiotic agave fiber.
Someone get us a dctnry, please.

Of course, we're wondering how much of this "rebrand" has to do with the vaguely naughty name. Though, as fans of Reston history know, pizza is far from the only thing that was naked in Reston's earliest days.

Before you drag Sally Struthers out of cryogenic storage, fear not. Apparently there's at least a partial cure to the scourge of vowelitis. Won't you please help (or hlp)?


  1. I think it's more of a vowel obstruction. Maybe that high-fiber, probiotic pizza crust will help.

  2. To be honest, I personally prefer my pizza fully clothed.


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