News and notes from Reston (tm).

Wednesday, September 7, 2011

Our Top 10 Reston Places, and Some Familiar Faces

Dear Leader recently told one of the fancy printed out "web logs" newspapers serving our community about the ten places in Reston he'd show an out-of-town guest. They include various brutalist pieces of art like Lake Anne's concrete boat and pyramid, examples of mixed-use and cluster development, and appropriately, the Embry Rucker homeless shelter, the Nature House, and RCC's Center Stage -- all unique things about our beloved earth-toned community. He even calls Fountain Square in the Fake Downtown gritty urban core "a perfect example of a plaza." Just don't tell these folks!

We sincerely like Mr. Simon's list. Of course, our own Restonian Top 10 might be just a little different. For the second time in as many weeks, roust Kasey Kasem from his money pile of Scooby Doo residuals, because we're counting them down, and the earth-toned hits don't stop until we get to the top!

10. The Metal Bob statue. Modesty surely kept Mssr. Simon from mentioning what is seriously a nice, human-scaled tribute to the man that built this city.

Screen shot 2010-05-11 at 10.06.29 AM.jpg9. The Great Hole of Reston, better known as the Reston Station construction site. Soon fanciful concrete bollards will watch over the site like the statues of Easter Island, confounding tourists and commuters alike.

8. Maria's Passion Paradise*
(*German and Japanese tour groups only)

7. Terraset Elementary, to see a rational, energy-efficent future that never was. And also to pay homage to the Mole People.

6. McTacoHut, for an immersive fast-food experience that even the Mall of America food court can't beat.

5. RA Headquarters, better known as the Aegean Stables of Filing Cabinetry.

4. The Green Forest Nudist Colony, Reston's original Lost Colony, Colonial Williamsburg, and Moulin Rouge all rolled into one.

Holy iPad 2 - Apple fans line up at Reston Town Center waiting for the clock to chime 5pm!.jpeg3. The Apple Store, Gap, Unos, and all the other unique boutiques that can only be found in our Gritty Urban Core (and the 10,000 other MSAs/DMAs that meet the appropriate demographic and psychographic metrics, as well as ample off-street parking).

2. Tall Oaks Shopping Center, known to retail historians throughout the world as the "graveyard of international food stores."

1. The Macaroni Grill. Was there any doubt on this one? Like Venice, people simply need to see it before it sinks beneath the waves is converted into a mixed-use wonderland, the end.

9 comments:

  1. What? No stop to see the raw meat storage facility known as the North Shore Pool?

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  2. Come on, Restonian. We know those busloads of German and Japanese tourists would be much happier trying to chat up the cougars at Jacksons.

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  3. No South Lakes Village Center? It is Reston in microcosm. A Starbucks, a supermarket, a gas station, a running store, and various restaurants. Perfect!

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  4. What about the zoo? Surely we are the only mauve-toned MSA that meets the appropriate demographic and psychographic metrics, AND has ostriches.

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  5. Anon 9:50 -- interesting. At first I said, "the zoo isn't technically in Reston" but then again, neither is the RTC ...

    So you're right -- why would we showcase RTC which only CLAIMS to be part of Reston for financial benefits to the developers but not the zoo?

    On the other hand, the Embry Rucker Shelter is on County land isn't it?

    So, our fearless leader would showcase some things over which we have no control, no say and are not unique to Reston. Isn't that like taking credit for someone else's "A" on a project for school that you just looked over but didn't invest any time/energy in developing?

    Sure, realtors are going to point out all of the "Reston wonderfuls" like RTC, etc. full well knowing those aren't RA members. But Realtors want you to buy the house so shades of the truth are reality to them. To the rest of us who pay the freight for the non-contributing so-called Restonians, it just sounds like RES is ... not.aging.well.

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  6. Terraset? Really?!? How can that claustrophobic Hobbit hole that they call a school make the Ten Wonders of Reston list?

    Jeez, when I took my youngest there for a tour of his prospective classroom, I felt like I had just entered the set of Das Boot. The interior non-window classroom was long and narrow, had book cases practically up to the ceiling on both of the long walls and they were going to stuff at least 5 kids and 4 adults into it. Krikey, the only thing they seemed to be missing was hammocks full of food stuffs slung from the ceiling.

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  7. How long ago was that? They have skylights in there and I thought it was amazingly bright and cheerful as opposed to the dungeon I was expecting. Great staff too. My kids LOVED Terraset. Plus they have a garden on the roof.

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  8. Update on the zoo. Now we have fish.

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  9. So no one else takes out-of-towners to ground zero of the Reston Ebola virus outbreak? We got our own Ebola, where's our pride in that?

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