News and notes from Reston (tm).

Friday, February 19, 2016

VY Not: Maybe They're Digging For Vowels

Groundbreaking

Please to be enjoying this photo of various luminaries "breaking ground" on the soon-to-be-built, vowel-challenged VY mixed-use project at Reston Heights. (We're guessing they were using shvls to dig.)

If the thought of another dollop of bollardy goodness isn't enough to get your earth-toned heart pumping, try this stirring quote from the grndbrkng ceremony:

“Reston continues to be a thriving submarket, and JBG is pleased to be expanding our strong presence here,” said Principal Greg Trimmer. “VY at Reston Heights will be an active destination with social public spaces, new living options, and new shopping and dining for all of Reston.”
That's right. You might have thought you're living in a community, silly rabbits, but you're not. You're not even living in a Census-Designated Place. Instead, we're all denizens of a "submarket." Think The Matrix, only with worse traffic and none of the awesome slow-mo bullet dodging.

In other vowel-related news, we stumbled across this exciting promotional video for the vowel-free BLVD apartments soon to open on the other side of the Toll Road. Check it, as the kids haven't said in years:

Along with some seriously sweet CGI of the rooftop pool and floor-to-ceiling windows in the bedrooms and the jet-age "stainless steel" appliances and whatnot, the video is chock full of awesome stock B-roll trying to "sell" the D.C. region as a hip place, with BLVD at Ground Zero of urban/suburban flair. We'll save you one minute and 41 seconds of your life and show you the money shot, naturally taken in a chain coffee (or, in this case, cff) shop:

Stock art

You may hate unrestrained development and faddish naming conventions, but you've gotta love that facial hair, the end.

4 comments:

  1. I moved out of (escaped?) Rstn two years ago, but these blog posts are still the highlight of my day! Now, I must be going, I feel the urge to shave...

    ReplyDelete
  2. Is it just me or does that hipster douchebag sipping his cuppa Joe bear a disturbing resemblance to Pee-wee Herman?

    If you're at the Bow Tie Cinema in RTC, just make sure you don't sit directly in front of him.

    ReplyDelete
  3. There is something that I can't quite put a finger on about a picture of 11 people in business attire poorly shoveling dirt that was needlessly placed in a row on top of already layed pavement at a site that has been under construction for months that strikes me as symbolic of the vowel-less future in store for our fair special-tax-district.

    ReplyDelete
  4. This is straight out of the SoDoSoPa episode of South Park. Hilarious

    https://youtu.be/miXMWJyOdgw?list=PLYwKCiFdgsokRhwBu91KGMg2dFTAzrfU2

    ReplyDelete

(If you don't see comments for some reason, click here).