News and notes from Reston (tm).

Thursday, November 20, 2014

Are You Urban Chic, An Enterprising Professional, Or Top Tier? Depends On Where In Reston You Live

Reston prides itself on its diversity, but in the cold world of marketing analytics, we all fall into one of five demographic segments. YOU HAVE BEEN ASSIMILATED. But are you urban chic? An enterprising professional? Top tier? Depends on what Zip code you call home and what market segment your psychometrics have bound you to, inexorably, with no choice of appeal or mobility. Unless, you know, you move to another Zip code, like maybe in "Great" Falls or something.

"Enterprising Professionals" can be found in all of Reston's Zip codes, and they represent the largest segments of both "the 20190" and "the 20191," as the kids probably never said, not even once, in jest. Trying to find yourself? HERE'S WHO YOU ARE:

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MAJOR ERROR. Obviously they meant the Macaroni Grill instead of the Cheesecake Factory. As for gambling, we do that every time we pass the paint section at Home Depot and start looking wistfully at the fuchsia tones. Also, does "web logging" count as a STEM occupation?

Also, apparently all the Olds Golden Years types live in 20190, presumably in houses along Lake Anne that used to have those bead curtains in the place of actual working doors.

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20190 is also, annoyingly, home to a third group called "Laptops and Lattes," but we're pretty sure they all live within a two-block radius of the Starbucks in Reston Town Center:

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EDGY.

But let's say you live in 20194, aka North Reston, where the sky is bluer, the streets are wider, the people are happier, etc. etc. Then chances are you are Urban Chic:

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That "sophisticated lifestyle" obviously doesn't involve mingling at the dog park.

But North and South Reston are also home to the 1 percent Top Tier, presumably in the McMansions that surround Reston proper. What are they like?

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Wow, they're just like us. We love opera too!

Herndon's not all that different -- except that its second-largest group is "Savvy Suburbanites," which says that "late-model SUVs, station wagons, and minivans may be in our driveways." Could be worse -- they could have to rock the Ford Foci, like the rest of us, the end.

7 comments:

  1. Demography is DestinyNovember 20, 2014 at 12:04 PM

    You'll find us in the shag carpeted living rooms of our 1970s ranchers and visiting eerily deserted "village centers." Our jobs involve institutionalizing the military-industrial complex. We don't necessarily like golf, but we don't like Not Golf either. We find dog parks too noisy; bocce too downscale; memorial gardens too depressing; and non-chain retail too non-chainy. We are the Restonians, and we are legend.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Love to be stereotyped and shoved into a bucket.

      But you're exactly right! :)

      Delete
  2. ...Our favorite color is a mix of russet brown and cedar. Our favorite appliance color is harvest gold. We prefer low ceilings.

    ReplyDelete
  3. Peasant From Less Sought After South RestonNovember 20, 2014 at 6:09 PM

    Household Type: Peasant
    Housing: Hovel

    We're salt of the earth peons who live on the wrong side of the Toll Road. Sharecropping and tenant farming fund our common, downscale, and unsophisticated lifestyle. Portfolios are filled with such non-financial instruments as pitchforks, butter churns, and rutabaga seeds. Our houses range in style from favela-style shanties to earth-toned cabins; two-thirds of us do not have indoor plumbing. Moonshine savvy, we're tops for owning stills and use our devices to get all liquored-up on Saturday evenings. Leisure time is spent illegally sneaking across the Toll Road to see how the swells live.

    ReplyDelete
  4. You'll find us sitting in mind-numbing traffic or paying $12+ each day for the privilege of commuting to DC on public conveyances that break down, single-track, or are inaccessible due to broken escalators. Our Ford Focuses may crank up the mileage, but we're happy we're not in Ashburn, though we secretly covet their Wegmans.

    If this is demographic research, I picked the wrong line of work.

    ReplyDelete
  5. With the new EO legitimizing 4 million undocumented Hispanics, we're going to need a sixth category: Illegalito.

    Coming to subsidized housing near you.

    ReplyDelete
  6. I don't fit! I'm none of these! *cries*

    ReplyDelete

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