News and notes from Reston (tm).

Friday, June 14, 2013

Manifest Destiny: RA May Admit Nearby Property, Is 'Great' Falls Next? (No, Probably Not)

Manifest Destiny.jpg

Go west east, and slightly north, young man, the RA seemed to be saying as the board voted considered whether to annex admit a home just outside of Reston into the friendly confines of Reston Association goodness, with all the pool passes and whatnot that entails:
Reston Association's Board of Directors will vote Monday to add a property - 11101 Chessington Place, Reston - to the association.

What makes that house so special? It's not the house, its the owner.

RA At-large director Donna Rostant and her husband recently moved from a home within RA boundaries to the $1 million home on Chessington. Since RA by-laws say a director must be an RA member, the solution seems to be to add the home to RA.

RA president Ken Knueven said the Reston deed outlines the process of adding real property to the Association.

A home can be added to RA with the written consent of the homeowner and any holder of a deed of trust and a two-thirds vote of the Board of Directors during a meeting in which a quorum is present.
So many questions… will the RA's newest home now have to be vetted against the DRB criteria for, say, Hickory Cluster, and will it have to be repainted in a fetching shade of asteroid? Will the board attempt to win back its just-departed CEO by annexing his home in Rockville?

Some people aren't happy about this decision, but we say they're just not thinking big. Why fight over the membership status of the future residents of a bunch of midrise dreck when the RA can grow its membership, and make it more exclusive to boot, by looking northward, to 'Great' Falls, or southward to Oakton? As our favorite correspondent, The Peasant from Less Sought After South Reston, points out, how inspiring would it be to see "an island of earth-toned goodness shining as a bright beacon of good taste in a sea of godless communist red mulch"?

Of course, there's one snag. RA's newest house is at least close to the rest of our earth-toned nirvana, but if more far-flung properties are added to its bosom, we'll need to organize a Berlin Airlift-style way of getting vital materials to them. The Peasant thoughtfully compiled this list of RA necessities:

-- Macaroni Grill breadsticks
-- rotary phones for RA pools
-- spare parts for RELAC
-- brown mulch
-- RA election ballots
-- grit for the urban core

We can picture it now:

RA Airlift.jpg

Inspiring!

And always remember, and never forget, as our BFFs at Patch helpfully point out:
Alternatively, for anyone who resents RA assessments and regulations - there is no streamlined process for leaving the Association.
Exactly.

15 comments:

  1. Reston is like the Hotel California. You can check out anytime you want but you can never leave!

    ReplyDelete
  2. Now you're done it:

    On a dark earth-toned highway,
    Derecho breeze in my hair
    Warm smell of cocktails
    From Jacksons, with all the big hair
    Up ahead in the distance,
    I saw a shimmering light,
    It was the sole dimly lit streetlamp in my parking lot
    As I pulled in for the night

    There they stood in the doorway,
    I saw the DRB paperwork
    I remember thinking to myself,
    Who on earth are these dorks?

    Then they pulled out their clipboards
    And they showed me the way
    My wood trim was unsightly and garish
    I thought I heard them say,

    Welcome to the Reston Association,
    Such a lovely place (such a lovely place)
    There's plenty of rules at the Reston Association
    Any time of year,
    You better watch your outdoor decorations...

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Peasant From Less Sought After South RestonJune 14, 2013 at 12:18 PM

      Don Henley...the new Poet Laureate of Reston!

      Delete
  3. Mirrors on the ceiling,
    Were perfectly a propos
    Given that my house was built
    Before Watergate arose

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Next thing I remember,
      I was running to Home Depot
      Had to get my window trim to the state it was before

      "Relax," said Bob Simon,
      We are programmed by the DRB,
      You can paint your house any time you like,
      But fuchsia it can never be!

      (begin bitchin' two-necked guitar solo)

      Delete
  4. Why do things like his no longer surprise me?

    ReplyDelete
  5. Is there not a single property in all of Reston Association that is good enough to Rostant?? Really? She looked everywhere and found NOT ONE? This is an absolutely ridiculous idea, adding just this one house on Chessington Place to the RA. What about the other 11 houses on that street? It would actually make more sense to just go ahead and add of all of the houses on Chessington Place. And Cameron Heath Drive, for that matter. Oh wait, that property on Chessington Place already has it's own homeowners' association! Fantastic! She can just be on the board there!

    ReplyDelete
  6. The RA board and executive staff are reaching new levels of self-importance and entitlement. On general principles, no one should be happy with the exorbitant salary paid to the last CEO, and adding this house beyond the RA boundaries just to accommodate a current board member should indeed leave a bad taste in our mouths. Ms. Rostant should have resigned from the board, and another individual should have assumed her position.

    ReplyDelete
  7. We need more dive bars. Everywhere.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. And why, pray tell, has no one considered annexing Herndon? We'd get the dive bars (Jimmy's, et al), and they'd get access to our sweeeeet pools. Seems like a good deal.

      Delete
  8. Remarkable. Just remarkable.

    ReplyDelete
  9. So all this means that if every year an RA director moves to a house just outside of Reston and that house becomes Reston property then by my calculations, after
    723,642,876,256,237,875,765.01 gazillion years from now...

    Reston will have consumed all of China.
    I can't wait to see the looks on their faces!

    ReplyDelete
  10. Everybody is Restonian (not Estonian) even if dey don't know it jet. They yust need to be assimilated.

    ReplyDelete
  11. If it is this easy, why don't they annex the RTC and the land along the Toll Road/Metro where all these new folks (who NEED recreational services) will be living? Why do they get to live the Reston Life without the Reston Price of submission to the RA/Design Review Board?

    ReplyDelete
  12. I would actually feel better about it if in cases like this there is a lottery for one lucky winner to be set free from RA's grip. An even exchange and a hope of escape without moving. That would be grand!

    ReplyDelete

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