News and notes from Reston (tm).

Wednesday, September 5, 2012

In North Reston, Lillypocalypse Now?

Lillies.jpeg
Ah, life is good in North Reston, where the grass is greener, the sky is bluer, the schools are named after astronauts, the golf courses are in no danger of being plowed under, etc., etc. But even in bucolic North Reston, there can be horrifying threats to our earth-toned way of life lurking right before our very eyes!

We're talking about the floating horror that is the common water lilly. And the RA's North Point Director, Mike Collins, wants to (maybe) do something about it.
"I've had many conversations on this subject with people who live around the lake," Collins said. "Some people dislike the aesthetics of the large patches, especially in the coves. Certainly, heavy concentrations can make boating or fishing difficult or impossible, so some people would like to see the lilies brought under control if not eliminated. Others love the lilies just as they are or don't think they are a problem that warrants expenditure staff time or money right now. "
The water lilly is one of Reston's verboten invasive species, but they can "provide good habitats for fish and can improve water quality." Or maybe "push out other species or create stagnant areas with low oxygen levels." We report, you decide.

The RA currently has no plans to treat the lillies, but one option would be to napalm treat the lake with a variety of herbicides -- either in a minimal way or by going Full Metal Jacket:
Full eradication (or close) with herbicide would cost around $5000 and will probably result in mats of decomposing lilies floating around the lake for a while.
Sounds pretty.

Meanwhile, Lake Newport also has the worst water quality of all of Reston's lakes, according to an annual survey (full report here, if you're into bar graphs measuring things like "conductivity"). We wouldn't use it to mix iced tea, but Lake Thoreau apparently has the best water quality.

You can take Mike Collins' survey on the water lilly scourge by following this link.

4 comments:

  1. '...some people would like to see the lillies brougt under control...'???!!!

    Mr. Collins has 'had many conversations' about lillies with Reston's famous mythical colony of the People of the Lake???!!!

    Oh.Dear.God.

    I guess we should all be thankful that Reston doesn't exist in Iceland. Can you just imagine the many conversations that would be taking place about global warming with the People of the Melting Ice Lake. Says Icelandic community activist Mike Collins: 'I've had many conversations about the melting ice at Lake Newport. Some people really hate the ice because it's slippery, so they're in favor of turning up the termostat on global warming because they're fairly confident that, being descended from the blood of Iceland's most famous King, Robert E. Simon, that they can walk on cold water. Others love the ice and believe a wooden Viking warship should be launched to Pluto to retrieve an emergency supply of very, very cold ice that might withstand this new phase of global warming.'

    There are MANY things said by Reston's most hyperactive concern troll ADD citizens that are best responded to by Bill Madison:

    Says Mr. Collins on the subject of the Civil War of the Lillies being brought under control...

    "I've had many conversations on this subject with people who live around the lake. Some people dislike the aesthetics of the large patches, especially in the coves. Certainly, heavy concentrations can make boating or fishing difficult or impossible, so some people would like to see the lilies brought under control if not eliminated. Others love the lilies just as they are or don't think they are a problem that warrants expenditure staff time or money right now."

    Says Billy Madison, who's really no fan of people who either love lillies, or hate lillies...

    "What you've just said is one of the most insanely idiotic things I have ever heard. At no point in your rambling, incoherent response were you even close to anything that could be considered a rational thought. Everyone in this room is now dumber for having listened to it. I award you no points, and may God have mercy on your soul."

    Billy Madison for President 2012

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5hfYJsQAhl0

    ReplyDelete
  2. "Lake Newport also has the worst water quality of all of Reston's lakes..."

    I'm both shocked and amazed that Lake Anne isn't the winner for that contest.

    Seriously, I've seen shit floating in Lake Anne that would turn most people white...or at least some kind of beige...

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  3. Rose By Any Other NameSeptember 6, 2012 at 8:48 AM

    Can it really be true that Bob Simon walks on water?

    ReplyDelete
  4. @Warpspeed

    In your face! Lake Newport is the loser lake! I'll take 2nd place for my beloved Lake Anne.

    And as an aside, the water lillies on that [s]disgusting filth pit[/s] Lake Newport look nice. Maybe a couple of volunteers in a canoe could ya know like do some weeding...

    ReplyDelete

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