We bring you shocking news from the most closely watched political race of this or any other season, the Reston Community Center Board of Governors 2011 Preference Poll. And in this bellwether election, the most talked-about issue has become the presence of canoes at the Wednesday forum:
On Wednesday evening, the six candidates in the Reston Community Center's 2011 Preference Poll will take to the CentreStage to outline what they would bring to the Board of Governors.Welcome to Communist Russia, where canoes bring you. But this is only half the story! Collected from a series of e-mails "obtained by Restonian," here are the real facts about Canoegate:
Candidate Rod Koozmin wants to bring a canoe on stage, and is miffed that executive director Leila Gordon has told him "no."
Koozmin says he wants to bring the boat because he hand made it in RCC's woodshop. The woodshop - expanding hours, availability and programming- is the central focus of Koozmin's campaign.
"I don't think bringing your canoe will work," Gordon wrote to Koozmin in an email obtained by Patch. "We have another candidate who builds things in the shop, and if you bring your canoe he should be able to bring his work, so I think it is best to just restrict this to the physical presence of the candidates."
- The canoe in question is called the "Wee Lassie," and it doesn't "take up any more room side-wise than, say, a laptop."
- Per Koozmin, "it might actually be useful in an emergency like a fire should one occur during the candidates forum as kind of a shield."
- Canoes could help fulfill the one-time dream of a series of canals connecting Reston's lakes.
- Canoes are hardly a side issue in this election, given their long and storied history in Reston, which includes this... and... well, mostly just that.
Update: RCC is now allowing Koozmin to bring his canoe and display it in the lobby during tonight's forum, according to e-mails "obtained by Restonian." Democracy restored, all's right in the world, etc., etc.
Update #2: A Confidential Restonian Wiki-Canoeleaks Operative shared this account of yesterday's forum:
More crowded than a GOP primary election in Takoma Park, a standing room only audience of...12...sort of filled the RCC for this evening's "meet the candidates" event, one that competed with such other simultaneously occurring RCC programs as dog obedience class, K-9 detection work, and the Narcotics Anonymous meeting. After a detailed explanation of upcoming RCC voting procedures, which if followed in 1960 in Chicago would have swung Illinois into Tricky Dick's column, we were greeted by our moderator, the one and only Lady Fairfax. All six candidates, whom I truly laud for their civic-mindedness, came up with such memorably snappy sound bites as "I'm not a one-issue candidate, I'm 3-D", "It's not for the glory that I do this", "I am aging in Reston wonderfully", and "Let's polish up the stainless steel around the pool."Of course, the real scandal is that only 12 people showed up. Have we mentioned that this group has oversight of unpopular multi-million dollar projects?
And, unless it were a stealth canoe that would prove useful in making waterborne getaways from the ABC store in South Lakes or transporting muffins at $16 a pop to Department of Justice conferences, alas there was nary a canoe in sight tonight.
In the interest of having more than 12 people hear what these folks have to say, here's video from Wednesday's forum: