News and notes from Reston (tm).

Wednesday, July 25, 2018

The Marketing of Reston Mixed-Use Development: A Play in One Act

INT. MARKETING MEETING - RESTON STATION

A series of EXECUTIVES are gathered around a table, anxiously awaiting what a MARKETING CONSULTANT has to say. The CONSULTANT stands and prepares to deliver a presentation.

MARKETING CONSULTANT
Nice set of parallelograms you've got here. The neon is a nice touch. Dynamic! But to attract a virbant millennial market, you need something else. You need to be relatable, give 'em something they can put on their, whazzitcalled, Instagrams.
A hush falls over the room. The CONSULTANT walks over to a covered flip chart and unveils an image.

MARKETING CONSULTANT
Hashtags, gentlemen, hashtags. Millennials love hashtags. And avocado toast.
Low voices can be heard among the EXECUTIVES. Finally, one raises his voice.
RESTON STATION EXEC
Promising. We like it! But millennials don't have the disposable income to drive our champagne wishes and caviar dreams of transit-oriented world domination. Besides, we don't want our subterranean parking lots filled with their Ford Focuses. I mean, gross.

We need something else. Something that captures the true spirit of mixed-use, transit-oriented development. Something that will finally silence all those nerds with their trivial complaints about "floor-area-ratios" and "infrastructure" and get them on board with the program.

The MARKETING CONSULTANT smiles.
MARKETING CONSULTANT
One step ahead of you, gentlemen.
The CONSULTANT flips over another page on the flip chart to reveal a new image.

Silence for a long moment. Then the EXECUTIVES burst into applause.

... and scene.

2 comments:

  1. Safe Space ForeverJuly 27, 2018 at 11:01 AM

    But this marketing campaign assumes millennials want to give up their rent-free lifestyle by moving out of mom and dad's basement.

    Millennials - The Lamest Generation

    ReplyDelete
  2. You forgot the epilogue, when everyone gets stuck in traffic trying to get out of the Woonerfy, avocado toast-laden "civic plaza."

    ReplyDelete

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